Greetings and happy July!
It is hard to believe that we are in the second half of the year and halfway through July. I know that everyone is talking about slowing down and to enjoy not having plans and I like that. However, I can’t help but feel like time is passing more quickly than I want it. When we were in the early days of covid, I remember thinking and telling people that the days are long but the weeks are short. Now it feels like everything is short. Or quick or moving too fast, I can’t decide.
For this issue and for the next few, I am writing about solo travel. It is something that some of you might already have experience with or that you’re curious about. I hope I can speak to you all. I am going to break it down by talking about my experiences as well as how to get started with being comfortable with solo travel. My first solo trip was to San Francisco in 2014 and my first international solo trip was to Iceland in 2015. Iceland was somewhere that intrigued me and also seemed safe, just far enough away, and navigable on my own because I’d learned English was widely spoken.
As mentioned, I’m going to tackle this in a few issues and I’m starting with getting there and accommodations. I’ll branch out into other subjects over the following 2 or 3 issues.
How to get started
I realize this is a very basic suggestion, but doing some of these activities on your own are a good start and you might already be doing them.
Dip a toe in at home: dine out alone, see a movie alone, go to a museum alone for the day, go to a festival alone or sign up for a multi-week class on your own. These are all things I’ve been doing for ages where I live and when I travel. Why not get started doing them at home? They’ll be good activities to do when you are travelling alone as well and will make you comfortable being on your own while travelling if you’ve never done them in your own city.
Wading in: Take a road trip or weekend trip somewhere alone, go to a festival/convention/sporting event (whether its a baseball game or participating in a bike race, road race, or triathlon, comic-con, whatever interests you) in another city within your country for a weekend. You could also join a group trip that focuses on an activity that you love like a yoga retreat, kayak trip, surf trip, painting or writing retreat, horseback riding trip, etc. You’ll be more relaxed and more confident around like-minded people. You’ll probably make some friends too.
Take the full plunge: Visit another country for more than a weekend and join a group trip or plan everything on your own. Some things you could focus your trip around: see your favourite band, sports team, participate in an athletic event or festival. If you want to feel very comfortable, pick somewhere that speaks the same language as you or your second language or somewhere where locals are known to be multilingual. It is also a good idea to peruse your country’s federal travel advisories and read them about potential destinations and then take them with a grain of salt. Anywhere can potentially dangerous if you’re not using your common sense.
Once you decide where you’re going, book your train tickets, flights, whatever your mode of transport is, to your destination. This is one area where I do like to be loyal to an airline or two. I like to collect points or miles and I have booked more than one international flight with miles or points. I used airline miles to book a ticket to Warsaw in 2016 and on that trip explored the Baltics from there. I like to buy early, 6-8 months in advance if the prices are good, so that I have time to save, plan, and look forward to things. I really like Google Flights because it is easy to use and you can set alerts, but everyone has their own flight monitoring favourite and I would love to hear some other suggestions since I’ve been using Google flights for so long.
More preparation and time to save were what helped me budget well and not be overwhelmed with costs when I went on a lot of solo trips between 2015-2019. I am not extravagant when I travel but I don’t like to feel like I have to limit what I want to do once I’m on the trip. I have a budget and leave room for surprises/little splurges, kind of like real life. Iceland was a particularly expensive first destination to choose, I set a budget of $100 USD per day (in 2015) and I am pretty sure I achieved that every day with food and snacks or came very close to it. I did run a marathon on that trip so I was eating more than usual but I also felt like I could not satisfy my hunger after that race!
Accommodations:
Once you’ve decided to take the plunge and booked your flights, I focus on where to stay. I’m a planner and decide where I’m going pretty well in advance but that is not always an option. If I have a lot of time until my trip the first thing I do is book a hotel room - either refundable or one where I’m not paying anything up front, which is most hotel reservations. I make sure I read the cancellation policy and make a note in my calendar of the last date to cancel without penalty.
About 2-3 weeks before I depart, I peruse hotel websites and the third-party booking sites as well as Airbnb for something suitable and within my budget but perhaps cheaper than whatever hotel I already booked. There are sometimes last minute deals! I had a very inexpensive stay when I was in Newquay this way and nice spot in London for an inexpensive price. Often, I do have to prepay at this point, but I don’t mind if I am getting a good deal. I also like eliminating one expense from my on-site expenses, for lack of a better word.
If you are travelling by yourself to somewhere where hotels, Airbnbs, etc. are expensive and you want to save some money, I do suggest either a shared Airbnb with hosts who seem eager to interact with their guests or a hostel. I stayed in some nice hostels in my 30s and I do like getting a private room or a room where I only share with 2-3 others. I’ve also had some nice times with an Airbnb hosts.
My three favourites are as follows, in chronological order.
2014, San Francisco. The host was a staple in the theatre scene and lived in one of the painted ladies that had been left to him (in a will) by a friend. There is more to that story but it is not mine to tell. Several afternoons while I was there, we had tea in the backyard and chatted and got to know one another. His lovely house had several bedrooms and I did chat with some other guests and his friends when they came to the house but he stands out as a great part of that trip and was a delightful host. I do remember at some point he told me that a member of Bauhaus was there and I met him as '“so and so from Bauhaus” but I cannot for the life of me remember who it was.
2016 in Warsaw: My host had moved to Warsaw from London to teach English. He had no remaining remaining family in England and ended up staying in Warsaw to host travellers in his 3 bedroom place. While I was in Warsaw the other guest room was occupied by a German woman who was in Warsaw for a tango conference. But the host and I also had some good afternoon coffee chats as well and we went to dinner at a Palestinian restaurant one evening and had a nice time. I hope he is doing well!
2017 Copenhagen: I stayed with a family whose two older daughters were out of the house and the son was 13 or so. Every morning, the mother made breakfast her son and me, and the husband had already left for work usually. I really enjoyed chatting with the mom every morning and getting to know them, and talking about our lives. They are the only names I can remember from this list, Lars and Pernille.
I had terrible insomnia on that trip and I was usually up with the early June sun (like 4:30 or 5 am) and then would go for a walk or run and wander around 5:30 and come back around 7/7:15 to shower and get dressed and hang out with them. I crossed paths with Lars one morning on his way out and explained how I had not been sleeping and that’s what I’d been doing and why he never saw me, so not to seem anti-social.
I know that not everyone loves staying with strangers, but I’ve had some really lovely experiences. I have never had any bad ones either. It can often feel safer too when you’re with a family or a host who has hosted a lot of guests. They don’t have to look out for you but you can tell them your plans and let them know where you’re going. All hosts were keen to know my plans and when I’d be back in a way that made me feel safe and comfortable.
Finally, as far as hotels go, I do like to collect points or nights when I can, but I’m not necessarily loyal to one hotel chain or another like I am with airlines. I like to pick a hotel that suits my budget, is close to public transportation or near attractions. When I was in Newquay, England last month, I selected based on price. Newquay was small and I had an enjoyable 25 minute walk to my surfing activities. I could have stayed somewhere closer but didn’t mind the walk and really liked the price.
Links
This article about Americans in Iceland really made me think about how we experience places when we travel.
“Everyone comes to Iceland with a version of Iceland they’ve made up for themselves.’
What to do if you get sick or hurt on a trip.
I’m still pushing Copenhagen.
A travel/tourism related Substack that I enjoy every issue of :
Consuming
Watching:
Sprint - I have not finished this documentary series yet about US Olympic sprinters training and competing in the lead up to the Olympics. But, I’ve picked my favourites for the 100 m races already!
The Bear - I enjoyed the third season and I love all of the Chicago scenery and the chef cameos. I like that every few episodes they dive deep into a a character’s past and every few episodes they give us major anxiety like that Christmas dinner episode. I would like season 4 to come out quickly since 3 ends with unknowns.
Reading:
At long last, I finished listening to Norwegian Wood by Murakami. I did not enjoy it. The female characters were annoying. The main character was annoying. It seemed to drag on but then had a sad ending to top off a story that never seemed to go anywhere. UGH. I have had several people tell me they love Murakami so I bought What I talk about when I talk about running (thanks to Petya for that suggestion) and I can tell I will like it more. I will give him another shot.
Clear - I wanted to like this more but I was kind of bored, I listened to it but really could not get into it. I think I need to try again with an actual book or the e-book.
Beautyland - I loved this. It was about an alien (Adina) who is born on Earth in a human body and is supposed to report back to her home planet’s superiors about humans because they’re collecting research. Adina has the entire breadth of human emotions and experience and this book was such a wonderful story.
Dixon Descending - Dixon was once a track star and missed going to the Olympics by hundredths of a second. He’s a school counselor at an all boys school. His brother talks him in to the challenge of training to climb Mount Everest and they then plan to be the first Black Americans to climb Everest. The story follows their training journey, climb and return to everyday life, injuries, and problems at Dixon’s job. I really enjoyed this, it also had the entire scope of human feelings and it is a rollercoaster. It was happy, heartbreaking, and simply a wonderful story about life and relationships.
Throne of Glass - I read the prequel to this Sarah Maas series in England and I knew I wanted to quickly pick up Throne of Glass. I was not disappointed. It is an entertaining read about a teenage assassin in a fantasy world. The main character is pitted against other killers, thieves, and criminals to win a contest to be the king’s champion.
I Hope this Finds You Well - quirky fiction about office politics and a flawed main character who does some sneaky things behind her coworkers back and has a sad past. Cute and enjoyable. I read it in a weekend.
World Within a Song - I listened to this book narrated by the author, Jeff Tweedy of Wilco, about his favourite songs in the world and what they mean to him. It was a quick and enjoyable listen with personal anecdotes tossed in. I like Wilco and Tweedy’s solo work so it was interesting to hear about what moves him. I also learned he has other books and I’ve added them to my list!
What do you want to know about solo travel? Ask away!
What is the first country you’d explore on your own?
What is the biggest roadblock to you travelling on your own right now?
Thanks for reading!
Sonya
LOVE these tips Sonya! I am a big solo travel fan. I took myself on a 4 week solo trip to Italy for my 30th birthday and it was probably my favourite trip, ever. Can't wait to read more.
I've been waiting for this one!! I love your tips for wading in. It seems so simple, but I've actually never been to a movie, restaurant or museum alone. I used to travel out of state a little bit for work and the closest I got was popping into a coffee shop solo. Otherwise, I ordered DoorDash and ate it in my hotel room like a gremlin. So maybe I need to learn to walk before I run :)
I also enjoyed The Bear! I binged all three seasons at once last week. I agree with your feelings on Season 3. I've heard some people who were disappointed that it didn't end more definitively, but I think it's set up the next season so well I don't mind.